Tuesday, January 2, 2007

Ode to the Internet

Was running through some webpages on various pitching prospects and came across articles on Hughes - of course - but then accidentally came across an old thread for Brad Halsey. Which immediately takes me back to Section 37 bleacher seats and chants of Brad Alco-hal-sey! As we die-hards await the chance to chant Phil-er-up Hughes, I decided to make an offhand list of some of my favorite sports nicknames. Both the obscure and the obvious.

So, without further adieu:

Dennis Martinez: "El Presidente"
Mike Hargrove: “The Human Rain Delay”
Ron Guidry: “Louisiana Lightning”
Fred McGriff: "Crimedog"
Walter Johnson: "The Big Train"
Orlando Cepeda: "Baby Bull"
Jimmie Foxx: "Double X"
Sean Casey: "The Mayor"
Lenny Dykstra: "Nails"
Dennis "Oil Can" Boyd
Don Zimmer
: "Popeye"
Jack "The Ripper" Collins
Phil Garner
: "Scrap Iron"
Johnny Damon: "Sparkplug"

Now that Pandora's box has been opened due to January's baseball-bordem-factor, I will also have to show some love to the NBA, NFL, etc:
Charles Barkley: "The Round Mound of Rebound"
Andrei Kirilenko: "AK-47"
"Never Nervous" Pervis Ellison
Damon Stoudamire: "Mighty Mouse"
Earl "The Pearl" Monroe
"Dollar" Bill Bradley
Shawn Marion: The Matrix
Vernon Maxwell: "Mad Max"
Kevin McHale: "The Black Hole"

Andre "Bad Moon" Rison
John Elway: "Mr. Ed"
Karl Mecklenburg: "The Albino Rhino"
Jack Tatum: "The Assassin"

Bjorn Borg: "Ice Borg"
Mike "The Body Snatcher" McCallum
This is probably the least significant contribution made to Bronx Liaison, but at least the stupidity of athlete nicknames has taken my mind off of MLB.com pictures of St. Louis Cardinals shortstop David Eckstein chugging tequila as Jayson Stark furrows his ESPN eyebrows. Only on a team as unimpressive as the 2006 Cardinals could Eckstein win a Series MVP. Of course this is pure bitterness defeating sensible thought because Jose Cuervo-stein has shown himself to be a tremendous team catalyst as well as an undeniable winner.

BIG UNIT: there is no news on the saga that has become "Randy to Arizona" as the distribution of money becomes a complicated mess that unintelligable ticket-slots like you and I could never understand. As George King reports, if Arizona becomes an unworthy trade partner the Yankees may fall back on San Diego as a potential fit for G-Unit.

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