Breaking: Torre Ain't Sayin' Nuttin

Today, reporters tried to coax former Yankees manager Joe Torre into discussing the recent Mitchell Report and two of its main attractions, Roger Clemens and Andy Pettitte. But, Torre ain't no stinking rat.

From ESPN.com:

Joe Torre won't pick sides between Roger Clemens and Brian McNamee, the former New York Yankees strength coach who accused the Rocket of using performance-enhancing drugs.

"You're not going to get me in that jackpot," the former Yankees manager said Wednesday. "I'd rather just stay away from making any in-depth comment about the whole steroid-HGH thing."

Torre, who managed Clemens for six seasons, spoke during a Golf Channel conference call ahead of the Mercedes-Benz Championship in Kapalua, Hawaii, where he will be honorary starter.

"I'm very close to Roger. When I say close to him, he was a great competitor for me. Andy the same way. And I certainly know they're two proud individuals that only like to do the right thing," Torre said. "I'd just like to leave it at that."

"It made it look like a lopsided report," Torre said. "Plus, don't forget, the Yankees have so many people coming through there on a year-to-year basis. We changed over quite often, whether it would be a player for the month of May, a player for the month of September. But I think the big part of it was the access, where these two people were both based in New York.

Torre suspects use may have been more widespread.

"When you're talking about 80 players that supposedly were using one thing or another, to me it may be an incomplete report," he said. "The only thing I do know is that the most important thing for us in baseball is to make sure that when we take the field, that the fans trust us. So whatever we have to do to make that happen, I think that's important."

There you have it. Torre won't turn states evidence, though he did take a nice shot at the Red Sox steroid report. Somewhere Clemens is planning his next move, no doubt under the guidance of Jake Gittes and Philip Marlowe.

This is the most entertaining circus since the Ringling Bros met Barnum and Bailey.