Dukes & His Comeuppance

This is just too sweet to ignore.

The former Devil Ray and admitted crack-cocaine advocate himself is on poop scooper duty in order to get his probation reduced. You missed a spot, Eli:

To get his misdemeanor probation cut short by five months, former Tampa Bay Rays outfielder Elijah Dukes spent 25 hours during the past week cleaning out cages and mopping at Lowry Park Zoo.

Attorney Grady Irvin and a team official for the Nationals, who traded for Dukes in December, said the ballplayer also passed weekly drug tests for six months.

Dukes, 23, removed large diamond stud earrings and tucked his silver chain under his T-shirt before standing before the judge. The former Hillsborough High standout kept his head down throughout the hearing, looking up and smiling only after the judge granted his request.

“You are in a wonderful position to be such a positive influence on so many young people that these are the kinds of things that prevent you from being that example,” Conrad said. “With great gifts I think you have great responsibilities as well. I’m hoping this experience, albeit for six months … will at least set a positive turn for your future.”

The words responsibility and Elijah Dukes mix like V8 and Hershey syrup.